Writer's Block

If there was one thing that I didn't plan on when I started this blog, it was writer's block - both the traditional type and the self-imposed type. You see, when things are going well, I love to talk. I have things to talk about for days. When things are not going well though, it's a totally different story.

I'm not a huge fan of talking about what is going wrong in my life. I prefer to talk about what is going right. When things start to go bad, I start to clam up. When things go from bad to worse, some people don't hear from me for days. All I can think about are the things that aren't working (take my car for example, which is now after three visits to the mechanic in five days is finally working), and just like I'm pretty sure you don't want to hear me talk about these things, I'm pretty sure you don't want to read about it either.

So...as I'm sure you've been able to tell, I've been having a pretty rough couple of weeks.

You see, I'm getting frustrated. This "holding pattern" is getting really old. Toss in being sick, car troubles, a sick dog, and some bad news about my seperation from the Coast Guard, and I can confidently tell you that I'm ready to land.

On a positive note though, yesterday was Andy's last day in the Bay Area before meeting his ship in Peru. Therefore, we took his new Supra out to the Coast. Our intention was to see a sunset and eat at some obscure little restaurant. We made it to the coast, and we ate at an obscure little restaurant (one that made amazing fried oysters and calimari). Unfortunately, work, fog, cows, and a hill got in the way of the sunset. No, really, I have pictures to prove it (well, at least of the hill and the cows).

They Say Everything Comes in Threes ...

Yesterday started out fantastic. I woke up feeling great for the first time in days. Yeah, I had a bit of a nagging cough, but it is going away, and well, I didn't have a fever. I counted that as a major victory.

So, armed with that major victory, 100 rounds of ammunition, and Andy's 12-gauge shotgun, we went skeet shooting yesterday. It was a really great time. I haven't shot a gun in a long, LONG time, so my aim wasn't very good. But, eventually I started getting it. The feeling I had when that first clay exploded as my shot hit it was priceless. I want a gun now. I almost bought one on my first drive across the country after graduation, but I decided not to. I think this time, I may actually do it. It was so much fun.So after all that, Andy dropped me off at tire place where I left my car that morning to get new tires on the front and an alignment, and I went down the freeway to get some new jeans.

On the way home from Target is when the real fun started. At 75 miles an hour on the 880 heading northbound, the Serpentine Belt on my engine disintegrated. I lost power steering and power brakes. Every light on my dashboard lit up like a Christmas tree, telling me that "Houston we have a problem."

Fortunately, Andy was able to come wait withe me for the tow truck, and give me a ride home after the truck dropped my car off in front of the Chevy dealership here in Alameda, where it will sit until Monday morning when they have agreed to fix it.

Family (of a sort)

I think my fever has broken (I am knocking on wood as I type this...no really, I am).

Last night was frightening. I woke up in the middle of the night shaking so badly I could not move. I was so cold...as I should have been with a fever of 103 degrees Fahrenheit. The scariest part was that I was alone.

I didn't go to work today. My boss called twice to make sure I was okay though. It was incredibly considerate of him. My friend Rosie stopped by after work to drop off some candle's I'd bought from his wife. When he saw how sick I was, the first words out of his mouth were "How can I help?" Last night I was supposed to go to the movies with Meg. When I told her that I was too sick to go, she also told me that I could call if I needed anything. When she found out how sick I was last night she scolded me for NOT calling her. My friend Andy offered to make me chicken soup last night...tonight I took him up on his offer. He also made me cheesecake. What a guy.

All of this has gotten me to thinking.

One of the biggest complaints that I've had since getting my commission has been the distance I've been from my family. I've often felt that I've missed out on the most important things in their lives - birthdays, anniversaries, holidays, promotions, all of those things that families are supposed to celebrate together. I've also felt abandoned at times when I have been lonely, or angry, or hurt, or like last night, sick.

When I leave here, I will be leaving behind a family of sorts. Katelyn, Meg, and Stephanie have become like sisters to me. Rosie and Andy have become like brothers. When things have gone right we have been there to celebrate each others victories. When things have gone wrong, we've been there to prop each other up. In 23 days I'm going to have leave that behind...for now.

I have never left a duty station before and felt sad about it. When I left Alameda the first time, I was rejoicing in the chance to move on to bigger and better things. When I left Honolulu, I left with a sense of relief that I could leave behind all of the mistakes I had made, and hopefully start anew. When I leave here, although I am excited to begin a new life on the "outside" with Ben, I will leave some of the best friends I have ever made.

I just hope I can always remember the ties that I've made here, even as we all move around the country. To all of my friends and "family," thank you so much for all of your support. I will miss you more than you will ever know.

I shoulda gotten a flu shot...

Today I came down with the flu. Just typing hurts. At the moment I have a temperature of 102 degrees Fahrenheit.

Why did I have to be so stubborn about getting that stupid shot ? :(

In a Holding Pattern

I have been lax on my postings lately. This is something that I feel a little sheepish about, but there just isn't very much going on right now. I'm in a holding pattern. All of my paperwork is finished for me to leave, and all of the arrangements have been made. Now all I have to do is be patient and wait. Just ask Ben though, patience is not one of my stronger virtues.

The only thing that really needs some firming up is employment for me on the other end. I won't be homeless, and I won't be destitute (I have 60 days of paid terminal leave and administrative absence coming to me). However, I know that after about a week of relaxing I will become very bored. So, I want to know that I have something else to look forward to. I've had preliminary interviews, and some of the leads have been promising. I'll just have to wait and see.

While I've been in a holding pattern, Ben on the other hand has been extremely busy. Every night I get emails from him, telling me about things things that are going on. The nature of my job right now also fills me in on what is going on in his neck of the woods. Ben is getting ready to assume a whole lot more responsibility with transfer season coming up, so he's been working hard to make sure he doesn't get TOO bogged down in work. Fortunately though, Ben has been able to send me some pictures from this patrol to share what he has been up to. So without further ado, or any amplifying information that tells TOO much, here are some of the pictures:

These pictures are from their first port call, when they got to work with British vessel HMS LANCASTER. Ben was up to his eyeballs in administrative work, so he didn't even get to enjoy the brief stop. He was able to get out for a wardroom function with both ship crews though.The next port call, Ben was able to get off the ship for some down-time, thankfully. I got so see some pictures of the beaches where he was, and I was insanely jealous (of course). But he got to golf and got to go shopping (which always bodes well for me...he he he), and just relax. The relaxing is the most important part if you ask me. And of course, being OPS comes with some serious perks, including getting to do really cool stuff like fly in helicopters...

That's all I have for updates from Ben about this patrol. As I get more pictures, I'll post them to let you know what he's doing and how things are going.

My San Francisco

Today I went to San Francisco for what may be the last time in a long, LONG time. My friend Andy came with me to keep me company, and also to help me take pictures so I wouldn't have to ask strangers. We went to my favorite places, and he showed me some places that I wish I had known about before. So, Andy met me at my house and we took the early ferry over to the city. From there we took the Muni train out to the coast, where I really wanted to start my trip. We rode the Judah train to the end of the line, getting off at Ocean Beach. Ocean Beach was a great place for me to start today because it is a place that my parents know well and love. They spent their 20th and 25th anniversaries in San Francisco, and would go down to Ocean Beach to walk and collect Sand Dollars. My mom made those Sand Dollars that she collected into Christmas ornaments...which my dog Holly promptly ate off the Christmas tree.From there we went up to the windmill in Golden Gate Park. For years I have heard about what are supposed to be amazingly beautiful tulip gardens around the windmill. I have yet to see a single tulip in bloom. Today was no exception.There were beautiful poppies there today though, so it wasn't all for naught, and we managed to walk the entire length of Golden Gate Park. I've never actually done that before. I got to see things in the park that I didn't know existed. Did you know that there is a man-made waterfall on an island in the middle of a pond there? And that from that island in the middle of the pond, you can see the entire peninsula of San Francisco, in every direction? That's me in the upper right hand corner of the picture...I climbed the rocks beside the waterfall.After exploring the island, we went to the Japanese Tea Garden, one of my favorite places in Golden Gate Park. It is so peaceful there that I could spend hours just wandering through, sitting looking at the interesting sculptures, and drinking tea at the little pavilion they have set up there.
One of my main objectives today was to get to the Conservatory of Flowers. That was the reason that Andy and I walked the entire length of Golden Gate Park (about 4 miles). It is on the far eastern side of the park...we started out on the western side at the beach. It was well worth the walk though. As soon as you walk in the doors, it is like being in a jungle...except this one has beautiful stained glass surrounding the main entry, and very few bugs. From that main entry way, you have your choice of four different rooms. One was full of orchids and rain forest plants. The next was full of aquatic and carnivorous plants. Both of these rooms were very interesting, but my favorite room was the one with the potted flowers and exotic plants. It smelled like heaven when we walked in. I could have stood there for hours...just breathing. But, of course, my stomach started telling me that I was hungry...it was time to move on.
From the Conservatory, Andy and I hopped a bus to the Palace of Fine Arts. It is a beautiful dome that was built in the early 1900s, and survives to this day with it's accompanying colonnade. It is an awe inspiring and peaceful place for me walk around. We were only there briefly, but I couldn't leave San Francisco without going there just one more time.
Our original plan after the Palace of Fine Arts was to catch a bus to Fisherman's Wharf and do some shopping there. So we walked...and walked...and walked...and didn't end up actually catching a bus. Instead we walked all the way through Fort Mason to Fisherman's Wharf. What a beautiful place. I had never actually been there before, and I am kicking myself for not taking the time to explore the city more during my time here.

This evening I finally bought a piece of artwork that I have been looking at for months. It is a picture of the Golden Gate Bridge at sunrise, and it is absolutely stunning. It will look fantastic on the wall in our apartment in Folly Beach, right next to Ben's picture of New York City.

With the day coming to a close, Andy and I headed for the Hard Rock Cafe so we could get a very late lunch before getting back on the ferry home to Alameda. He collects glasses from Hard Rock Cafes all over the world, but hadn't actually spent enough time in port to go there. So off to dinner we went, and we caught our ferry home.I had a great time today, exploring San Francisco as a tourist. I wish I had done it more while I was here. Oh well. If Ben and I stay associated with the Coast Guard long enough, I'm sure we'll be back...

On my way

Today was another good day.

This morning I was able to pick up my final orders. These are the last set of active duty orders that I may ever get. They are my separation orders from the Coast Guard, indicating that my last day in the service is officially May 22, 2007 - five years exactly to the day from when I joined. What a long, strange, sometimes frustrating, but wonderful trip it has been.

In my orders, the Yeoman that prepared them worked magic. I am getting all of the allowances that people normally on active duty get when changing duty stations. Those personnel separating from the service typically don't get those allowances. She was able to find a loophole for me, and the Coast Guard will give me enough money to pay for gas and lodging. I can't tell you how much that put my mind at ease.

My date to go on terminal leave is now official. My last day of work for the Coast Guard will be March 30, 2007. Ben now has an airplane ticket to fly out here March 31. We will leave for South Carolina after church on Sunday, April 1. I am so excited.

With my orders, I was also able to firm up a date for the movers to come get all of my things. They will be here March 27 and March 28 to pack my things up in a truck to move across the country. I can't believe this is all happening so fast!

So, tonight to celebrate I went out to dinner with Meg and her little boy, as well as a friend of ours who is here on temporary duty. We went for Thai food at the best Thai restaurant in town. On the way home, I bought myself 15 roses and a bottle of wine to celebrate. I was aiming for tulips, but they were sold out at Albertsons, and the roses were on sale for less than ten dollars...they are pretty flowers though.

So this evening, I'm going to have a glass of wine, curl up with a good book and a cuddly German Shepherd, and enjoy my flowers to celebrate going home.Here's to new beginnings!