Of All the Times to Forget the Camera

This weekend's trip to New York City was amazing. Unfortunately, I don't have any pictures to document it. I realized that the camera was sitting on my desk at home, and Ben's was on his dresser right about the time the plane started to taxi out to the runway. In my defense, the sun wasn't up at that point, and wouldn't be until we landed in Atlanta.

But, I digress.

As with any trip that Ben and I take, there is always some little snag that has the opportunity to become a huge snag if we let it. This time it was the torrential rain on Friday night. On Friday night, we went to go see Les Miserables at the Broadhurst theater. So, of course, we got all dolled up in some of our nicest clothes, I did my hair, and I even wore heels (shocking, I know), and we left our room ahead of schedule. If we didn't make it to the theater by 5 minutes before showtime, our tickets would become null and void. We figured that by leaving an hour to go 10 blocks, we would be able to catch a cab and make it to the theater in plenty of time...boy were we wrong. It took nearly 40 minutes to catch the cab...and once we did, we were in gridlock. Somewhere around 41st street, we bailed out of the cab and started to run. Somewhere around 43rd street, I took off my shoes and ran in my stockings, in my little black dress, through the pouring rain. We made it on time though, and enjoyed a fantastic show! After the show we had some of the best pizza I think I have ever tasted.

On Saturday, our first order of business was to get me up to Yankee Stadium. I know, it seems sacrilegious for a Red Sox fan to be adamant about a visit to Yankee Stadium, but I wanted to see it before they tear it down. Now I have, and I continue on despising the Yankees into eternity.

After our visit to the Bronx, Ben took me to Rockefeller Center so I could see where they put the tree. If it hadn't been raining, we would have gone ice skating. After our visit there, we went to Saint Patrick's Cathedral, at the suggestion of my friend Sam. What a beautiful church. The architecture and the stained glass were amazing. I have to admit it was a little awkward to be at someone's wedding with a bunch of tourists gawking at the church (what a way to ruin a ceremony...with a bunch of people you don't even know talking throughout your vows), and the gift shop set up in the cathedral was not the classiest thing I've ever seen...but my goodness what a beautiful church.

After our visit to Rockefeller Center and the church, Ben and I went to Times Square. I still can't get over the sheer number of people there. I have never seen so many people in one place! It was a really neat thing to see. We capped of our visit to Times Square with a walk through the biggest Toys R' Us that I've ever witnessed. Three floors of toys! And a Ferris Wheel! We made it out with our wallets intact, and headed back to the hotel. I needed a nap before the World Series game :)!

It was quite an experience to watch the Red Sox pummel the Colorado Rockies while sitting in Yankee Territory. the funny thing is, I'm not the only one who was cheering for the Sox in that bar! We went to a place called O'Haras, less than a block from the World Trade Center site, and sat at the bar beside a group of Englishmen. What a fun group of guys!

After the game ended, it was time to head back to our room. My trip was pretty much over. However, it was a really good trip. Things between Ben and I are getting much better. Not everything is 100 percent yet. However, if this trip did anything, it was to remind us what we are fighting so hard for.

When Titles Are Superfluous...

This month has been a bad month, and it's not even over yet. I know that I promised to write more...it's just that I have had a hard time finding things that I'm comfortable writing about in my life right now.

I started a second job when Ben left...and proceeded to quit it three weeks later because I hated it.

Ben and I have been having some serious problems (I hate admitting that on the Internet where you can all read it, but, it is what it is). Serious enough problems that I almost moved out last weekend. Disturbing enough that they've rocked me to my core, and destroyed some of the best memories of my adult life, replacing them with anger and hurt. But, we've agreed to commit ourselves to trying to fix it. Therefore, I leave for New York City tomorrow at 6 a.m. to see him as the DALLAS moors. When he comes home, we will go into counseling to try to save all that we have created here.

And...the hardest thing of all...I have admitted that I am depressed. For this, I am seeking help and counseling. I want to be the person I used to be. The one who could climb any mountain that was put in front of her without batting an eyelash. I'm tired of being sad and scared, and always looking behind me, waiting for fate to kick me in the ass.

So far, I think it's helping. Wish me luck.

The Old College Try (Whatever That Is)

A few weeks back, Ben asked me why I stopped blogging. I really didn't have an answer to tell him. I could say I've been too busy. I could say I didn't have anything tow rite about. Those would be lies though. During this last inport, we've been to California (yay, San Francisco!). We went home to Massachusetts to visit Fenway during a Yankees series (the ultimate pilgrimage to Baseball Mecca if you ask me). We bought a new mattress. I've taken a second job. Katelyn came to visit (Double YAY!). There have been plenty of things to write about. I've actually written several blog entries, but haven't posted them because I didn't like them and thought I would go back and edit them later.

I just haven't.

I don't know why.

I guess part of it might be that I just don't feel like writing lately. Work is bothering me a LOT lately. Ben and I have gone through some serious growing pains in the last couple of months. My car is acting up, and I'm just NOW beginning to start making friends (of course, because I'm leaving in six months).

I'd be lying if I said that I don't feel isolated out here. I can count the friends I have on one hand, with fingers to spare. I'm hoping that I can make some more friends while waitressing, and maybe then have SOME kind of social life. That's one of the things that drove Ben nuts during this last inport. I had no social life, so I wanted him to hang out with me...constantly....to a point that I can admit I was probably being overbearing.

Well, I'm trying something new. I'm going to try to come out of my shell, and actually make friends. Also, I'm going to try to post more often (I know I said this LAST time too).

Wish me luck!